When we speak of "culture", it's a relative term. It might be a stylish production of "Lips Together, Teeth Apart" at the local repertory theater; it might be the MOMA; it might be yogurt. Certainly, it's not a word most of us would use of ourselves, although we might describe someone else that way, someone we admire, whose erudition causes a slight inner sensation of inferiority.

But, actually, we're all cultured. We are all a product of a society, a culture made up of nation, region, history, and family. Family, especially, makes us what we are. It enculturates us. Despite Tolstoy's assertion, happy families aren't all alike. No family is like another--the unique qualities of each family's culture set it irrevocably apart.

In a healthy, functioning family, this separateness is something to celebrate, I think. A family's culture gives each of its members some wonderful gifts: acceptance, identity, joy. Perhaps also some moments of exasperation or annoyance, but those are gifts, too--they enable everyone in the family to extend more grace to those who are outside the family, and to each other, as well.

So if a family's unique society is a valuable thing, how can it be nurtured? Can family culture be tended and husbanded like the family garden? I think so--through the rhythms of daily rituals, through the joyous re-enactment of family traditions, through the use of books and music.

I'd like to explore all of those things here. Join me?